Deja Vu All Over Again

I think I did this already last year….oh well….time to do it all again! 
raising kids 
cleaning house 
grocery shopping 
appointments
more appointments
special events 
gardening 
decorating 
creating
planning
hoping
growing
learning
becoming

funny how every year is the same….yet different. 




I’m not a resolution writer.
I think it’s because I am sure I will fail 
and 
once I’ve actually written down something I want to do 
or 
tell someone something I want to do 
then the evidence is there….
which can make me feel MORE of a failure
if I don’t achieve my goal
isn’t that awful?
It’s embarrassing


Holding my first porch sale was sort of brave I guess
And approaching the gal who owns Chartreuse 
was sort of brave too
creating this blog was brave (for me)
and selling things online too….
OK, maybe I’m not such a chicken
  I tend to keep my dreams to myself 
which is not necessarily a good thing…
it’s a habit which is born out of insecurity. 
I hate that part of me…
the insecure part. 
I know where it comes from but I wish I didn’t have it. 
I wish I could be free and brave and risky. 
open a shop 
write a book 
wear the funky clothes I love 
take a trip 
take a photography/pottery/painting/anything else class
and just  enjoy everything a bit more 
Instead 
I save money 
wear practical careful clothes 
cook inexpensively 
eat carefully 
deny myself
and engage in too much negative talk in my head
reminding myself that I have 
duties and responsibilities,
that I’m too this (old) 
too that (large) 
not enough this (gifted) 
not enough that (time/money)
Gee whiz…
I have ISSUES!
 I definitely need to banish this from my life!
Maybe I can do that

THIS IS NOT A RESOLUTION!!
(I might fail remember)

I’m not sure what the difference is between 
dreaming 
wishing 
or hoping


I know I do all three quite a lot
about things I want to make
art I wish I could produce
rooms I want to decorate
whole meals I would cook
 parties I would have
clothing I would design
things I’d like to 
achieve
do
see
experience



So wishes, hopes, dreams and plans all merge together
Hopefully resulting in some of this:


I’m a dreamer and a wisher and a hoper
this year I hope I can become more of a doer

THIS IS NOT A RESOLUTION!!!














Comments

  1. All of the things you think you are “not”….you are 🙂 More incredible than you give yourself credit for. I feel the same as you do at times and maybe this year will be the year you believe in yourself more, like we all believe in you! I loved this post.

  2. Hi there – The wish pebbles image is of my own product, I’m really glad you liked it enough to share it! You can find these pebbles, and lots of personalised ones too, on my website – http://www.pebbletree.co.uk. Donna x

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